Poems that make us Smile          Laughter is Medicine for the Soul         ... Patricia Mary Simpson

 Poetry allows us to express our  deeper feelings  without appearing trite ......   Keith Scott

To enjoy more poetry:  Love   Poems that Touch Us   Courage, Endeavour and Inspiration   Whimsy   Nature   Poems of Scotland   Other Poems   Songs and Ballads   En Français  To Return to my Home Page

AN ODE TO SPRING Now spring has sprung It’s allergies begun; Snotty and sneezing Drippy and wheezing Headaches so stunning Our noses are running! For this we all waited With breaths that were baited? With pills and sprays We will fill our days While all through the summer Our noses’ll grow numb’er Until relief comes again With an end to our pain When gone is the mold With the return of the cold! BIG ED In commiseration for Ed's wife and for those who remember that old country and western ballad ... Big John Every morning ‘about nine you could see him arrive. He stood six-foot-six and weighed three-forty-five. Kinda of heavy at the shoulder and lardy round the tub and everybody knew you couldn’t hide no grub from …. Big Ed. Nobody seemed to know if Ed ate alone He just drifted to the table and ate you outa home. He didn’t say much, just pass that piece o’ pie and if you ate at all you just had crumbs from Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed. Somebody said he came from New Orleans where he got in a fight over some Boston beans and a crashing blow from a huge right hand sent the offending plate to the promised land. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed. Then came the day when the clock struck nine as Ed walked in and waiters started crying. Diners were praying and hearts beat fast and everybody thought that they'd eaten their last …. 'cept Ed. To the buffet in a room where a silence had fell walked that giant of a man that the diners knew well. Grabbed the last sausage and gave out with a groan and like a giant oak tree just stood there alone. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed. And with all of his strength he gave one mighty fart; then a diner yelled out that smells mighty tart! And twenty men scrambled from a would be grave and now there's only one left in there to save …. Big Ed. Giving sighs of relief they prayed it was ended then came that rumble from a stomach distended and methane gas belched out of that diner everybody knew it was the end of the line er … for Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed. Now they never reopened that worthless caff they just placed a marble plaque on the path; These few words are written on that plaque: Somewhere in this old diner lies a big, big man; Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed. Big Ed. Big Ed. Big Fat Ed.

To enjoy more poetry: • Love  • Poems that Touch Us  • Courage, Endeavour and Inspiration  • Whimsy  • Nature  • Poems of Scotland  • Other Poems  • Songs and Ballads  • En Français  To Return to my Home Page